Thursday, September 13, 2012

Impulsive Behavior

**First off, I owe an entirely different kind of post to this blog, but that one is on hold because I want to do it justice.**

This is possibly the first of three posts today.  Possibly.  That's the plan.  We'll see if I live up to my goals.

Two nights ago I was on okcupid checking my messages, and I randomly clicked to see who was in my "Quiver".  OKC picks out three "Quiver" matches that they think you might like and you have to message them or say "I'm not interested" before they change.  Historically, my Quiver is a big time loser, so often I just ignore it.  But I was tired of seeing the same three tiny faces up there, inscrutable as they were, so I went to look.

Not interested.  Not interested.  Interested?

The third candidate was cute.  I read his profile and couldn't believe how many things I was nodding along with, or that I count among my own personal favorites.  I couldn't ignore all of the commonalities, so I messaged him.  It was a longer than usual first message for me.  I told him about all of the things I liked in his profile and probably rambled.  Sent it off, out into the online dating universe it went.

I got a message from him towards the end of yesterday.  He suggested we chat on Gmail later on in the evening.  I went to the gym, got my workout in, came home, and once I was settled I messaged him.  We chatted for maybe 30 minutes, continuing to find commonalities and establishing a nice banter.  We were talking about activities we enjoyed, and one that came up was bowling.  Out of nowhere he suggested we go bowling.  We confirmed an alley nearby was open, and randomly decided to go with the impulse.  BTW, this guy lives like 5 minutes from me.

We bowled.  I lost.  But I laughed a ton, and had a really good time.  We got along very well, and it was flirty, but nothing overboard, and we're both sarcastic and the banter showed it.  We bowled until the alley closed at midnight, so we got about an hour and a half in.  Three games:  I lost them all, but I played better than expected.  :-)

We spent about 20 minutes talking outside afterwards.  Back at home, we IMed briefly before we switched to the phone, where we talked until nearly 2:30 in the morning.  Ridiculous!  During that conversation we made plans to get together on Saturday.  We are going to do a winery tour(s), which I've never done before.  I told him I've yet to learn to like wine, but he's a big fan, and I am willing to give it a whirl and see how it goes.  Post-winery the plan is to watch football.  Both of our teams are playing at the same time, and we're in the same conference...we're actually playing each other next weekend.  Go figure!

So that happened.  No good night kiss, just a hug, which felt right.  I hate that moment at the end of the night in the early, early stages where you don't know what should/will happen.  Awkward.  I tend to believe that when the moment is really right it will happen, and I won't be sitting there consciously analyzing it.  I *thought* about how I wouldn't mind if it just happened, but it's also kind of nice to be chaste and innocent to start with.  It was refreshing to not have someone staring at my chest, or trying to paw at me, or making inappropriate comments. 

I have no idea what will happen.  Truly.  Anymore I don't even assume that a discussed second date will occur because I've had too many instances where things fall apart unexpectedly.  I'll believe it when I see it, and we'll see how it goes if it goes.  Bottom line?  I had a really good time, and I laughed, and it was nice.  :-)  This time, anyway, impulsive behavior paid off.


  1. :) :)The wineries are great. I recommend 3 Fox if it's nice this weekend because it's BEAUTIFUL there. Bring a little picnic and you can sit in the vineyard with your food and vino. Have fun!!!

  2. @Ames: Yeah, I have no idea where we will go, I will leave that up to him since I'm a newbie on that front. As far as food, I think he wants to grill dinner after the winery, with the football. We'll see! This all assumes a) it happens b)I want to hang out more after an afternoon with him. ;)

    1. perfect. the wine thing can be short if you're not feeling it or longer if you are ;)

  3. I love this. And I hope he gets you onto wine. I'd say start with the sweeter ones and work your way up (that's how I started and now I can't stand sweet wine, like Reislings unless they are from Germany and SUPER dry). HAHA I KNEW I should've had something other than Red Zin in my place!

  4. I love wine. I started with Cabernet, now I really like whites. I hope the guy isn't a wine snob, but if he is, hopefully he isn't too annoying about it.

    As for the guy, I'm so jealous and can't wait to hear more! I haven't been reading your blog long enough to know about past relationship behavior, but take it slow with this guy and see if he sticks around.

    Sounds like the 'when you are not looking..' mantra that single gals hear and roll their eyes about may actually have a ring of truth to it.

  5. @Heather: Three wineries under my belt, and all I can definitively say is that red wine and I are not friends, LOL. I didn't like the taste, but it also gave me an immediate headache! :o White was okay...I could drink it if it was there. ;)
    @Danielle: I'm with you, I prefer whites apparently! We'll see about the rest....that's another post!