Pages

Monday, October 22, 2012

Offline Dating

Dating.  I've done a lot of it online.  Since I'm still single and have been for well over a year and a half, clearly I didn't find too much success with it.  But it proved to be a very interesting learning experience, and it made me much more comfortable with the concept of dating in general.  I also got a lot of awesome stories out of it.  ;-)  However, it started to wear on me recently, so I opted out of that world for awhile.  I've no doubt that I'll go back, but for the time being, I'm doing okay without.

I've been working on being more social.  Attending meetup groups.  Saying yes to things when I would have maybe previously said no.  Just being more open and friendly in general.  It helps that I've gotten more confident with myself in recent weeks as a benefit of working out and making such a serious effort to get in shape.  However, I also attribute this to the nerves being worked off by all of the silly one off dates I went on through my online dating adventures.

Here's the thing, though:  I'm still here.  I'm still a person who would like to find a connection, and I'm now a person who is feeling pretty good and is putting out some good mojo into the universe when I'm out and about.  I'm happy, and I think it shows.  In the last week, it seems like little things have been happening, with varying levels of reciprocated interest on my part.

* I met a guy through a friend of mine, and I've run into him a handful of times during happy hours.  He found me on Facebook and friend requested me, then I found him and added him on LinkedIn, just because.  We know some of the same people professionally, so I figured the networking wasn't a bad idea.  He messaged me on Facebook a couple of weeks ago, and we were predominantly talking about football.  This weekend he messaged me again and suggested we get together to watch a game soon.  Hmm.  Possibly innocuous, but I'm not sure.  Either way, he's a nice guy, but I've got zero attraction to him and I wouldn't feel comfortable enough to spend 3+ hours solo with him.  I've yet to respond!  Probably will with some noncommital reply, friendly, but avoiding, LOL.

* Met a guy through this meetup group I've attended a couple of times now, and he was in attendance at the movie Friday.  He was my touchstone that night because I'd met him previously, so we chatted and caught up.  We ended up going to see a midnight movie at a different theater later that night, and we drove over together from the first theater.  We both got snacks and ended up sharing, but we'd shared an appetizer and tried each other's desserts the first night we met, with another guy added into the mix then, so I didn't really think anything of it. 

When he dropped me back at my car he suggested we do it again for another movie we both wanted to see, and I told him I'd get back to him, as I had tentative plans to see it with another friend.  Later this weekend he messaged me and was asking about my weekend, how it went, etc.  He told me he had a good time seeing the second movie with me and that we should do it again sometime. 

He's a sweet guy.  Kind of a little dorky, but in a not totally unappealing way, LOL.  Big movie buff, good job, lives nearby.  He's kind of goofy, but I think it was maybe a little nerves?  I eventually responded and told him that sure, if something noteworthy came up we should go check it out.  I have no idea what direction this is going, but he seems to be giving me interested signs.  I mentioned I wanted to do something haunted and he told me about a meetup event he's attending saturday for a haunted thing and offered to drive me if I wanted to attend.  He also mentioned a movie in JANUARY and asked if I was interested, LOL.

Ah, the prospect of offline dating...it's weird to me!  For the longest time I wasn't meeting anyone in the real world that I would ever consider dating, and even now I'm not sure about anyone I've mentioned here.  But the concept is intriguing, and it's nice to consider something different.  I think I'd forgotten that sometimes people just MEET naturally and decide to date, instead of the constructs of meeting online.  I guess it's good to be reminded!

In the meantime, I'm just going to keep doing my thing.  Acupuncture and gym tonight.  Trainer and gym tomorrow.  Abs class (and possibly gym) wednesday.  Trainer and gym thursday.  Weekend?  Up in the air.  :-)

I've got lots of things on my mind...possibly another 5k in a couple of weeks.  Maybe another, longer walk/run in November.  Figuring out my pre-Halloween weekend plans.  Appreciating that the pants I had to completely abandon wearing a few months ago because they were too tight went from being too tight to just right to a little loose to pretty damn loose.  :-)  Knowing that I've earned that from working my ass off lately.  Feeling good about nice things my trainer said about me to my friend at the 5k on Saturday, and knowing that I am capable of even more!

If I didn't know any better, I'd say I'm having a pretty good Monday!

9 comments:

  1. Don't discount the nerdy ones! Sometimes they're the best!!! They come outta the woodwork when you're not lookin', huh?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. LOL, not discounting, I would do something with him again. Just intrigued.

      Delete
  2. Don't discount the nerdy one's as well. Since I started the whole therapy thing I've realized how much I have isolated myself. I'm going to checkout the whole meetup.com thing, I know a few people that have used it and I'm looking at joining a book club. Baby steps but I'm tired of missing out on things because I don't have anyone to do them with.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I won't. ;) Yeah, the meetup thing can be fun! I've met some nice people when I've attended events, and it's a great way to do the things you want to do, but can't find anyone who wants to join!

      I need to start a scary movie night at home and pumpkin carving meetup, just for the next couple of weeks, LOL.

      Delete
    2. I've thought about doing meetup as well. Good to know you've had luck with it.

      Delete
    3. There's a movie night one I'm going to check out, and there's a Tea group for single women 20-30. I may check that one out as well. I'll let you know how it goes.

      Delete
    4. It can be hit or miss sometimes, but if you try enough you can generally find a good fit. :) ThatAshGirl, the one I met the boy through is a movie meetup.

      Delete
  3. I should follow your lead, and try that meetup thing. I love being at home too much.

    I like the sound of the second guy, and it may be just nerves, and perhaps he isn't as experienced in dating as you (we) are. You know either of us could probably teach a class on how to date, and perhaps he hasn't been on a date in a very long time.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It's definitely worth a shot, I've had a good experience with it. :) I love being at home, too, but I'm just trying to make sure I don't get TOO complacent, you know?

      That's a very good point about that guy. I guess I forget that not everyone has been serial dating for the last year and a half, LOL. We probably COULD teach a dating class! :o

      Delete