Friday, August 31, 2012

I'm a woman, not a gangster

Happy friday, all!

I have a confession to make.  Against my better judgment, I reactivated my online dating account, JUST TO SEE.  I've been much less overstressed by work, and I feel like I'm doing a good job of balancing my job, my new fitness plan, and everything else.  I thought it couldn't hurt, so up it went.  Still not my first priority by any means, but I was running out of blog fodder, so... ;-)

So I exchanged a couple of messages with one guy last night, and he seemed really likeable.  Normal, not pushy, not weird, just funny and sincere.  I was kind of pleasantly surprised!  So he sends me a chat request on the site, and we spend a bit talking. 

In the midst of our conversation, he asks me what I would wear if we went on a date.  My weirdo radar went up immediately.  Sure, it sounds fairly harmless, but usually this is a segway into a what are you wearing kind of avenue, and I didn't feel like sharing the cut and color of my underthings to this guy. 

BUT, I humored him.  I told him it depended on what the date was, so he said dinner at a really nice restaurant.  I told him probably a dress and heels in that instance and that I liked to get dressed up for the right occasion.  However, I then went on to say that I also love a hoodie on a fall day. 

I told him this for two reasons:
1) It's true.  I adore hoodies.
2) I wanted to make sure he understood that I'm not a dress up all the time kind of girl.  I don't like to misrepresent.

When I said the hoodie thing he went "Argh" or "Ugh" or something along those lines.  I waited for an explanation, but one didn't come, so I clarified that I wouldn't wear something like that on a dinner date like he'd described obviously. 

He responded with, "No, I wouldn't let you."

Hmm.  Radar pinged like crazy.  I waited. 

"You're a woman.  Not a gangster."

I couldn't believe what I was hearing.  Are you effing kidding me?  "Hoodies don't equal gangster," I told him.  I was not amused.  I then pointed out that most women don't want to wear heels and dresses all the times, and that while I was sorry to shatter the illusion, but that's not terribly comfortable on a daily basis, and not even appropriate for some situations.

We talked briefly after that point, but by then I was mentally done.  First of all, no one LETS me wear anything.  Second of all, I feel really sad for an individual who hears hoodie and thinks gangster. 

Someday I will find a man who likes me just as much in a dress and heels as he does in a hoodie and jeans.  Today is not that day. ;-)


  1. Ewww. Seriously? Check, please! Glad you didn't waste another moment of your life on a date with this guy.

  2. Right??? Talk about red flags. Someone sounds ignorant AND sexist, LOL.

  3. Put him in a pair of heels and see if he wants to wear them every day!

  4. In the all mighty words of Drake "Sweat pants, hair tied, chillin with no makeup on, that's when your the prettiest"

    If Drake rapped it, its totally true... Or at least I believe him.

  5. @Danielle: LOL, that is awesome. I believe (and agree with) Drake! Seriously, though..who wants to be with someone who's pissy at the idea of me being dressed casually? I'll pick my hoodie over this jackass anyday. :)