Blue Moon Smiling

So I had date #5 this weekend.  I've decided to call him Bluefish because we are stupidly well-matched, because we met on Plenty of Fish, and because I can abbreviate it BF, and one day I hope that I can honestly declare for 100% sure that that also stands for Boyfriend.  ;-)

In reality, this felt like dates #5, 6 and 7.  We spent a full 24 hours together. 

I got to his place about 5pm Saturday.  I left at 5pm today.  I did not get tired of him.  He did not get tired of me.  I learned so much more about him and vice versa.  I laughed almost constantly.  We went to dinner.  Food was amazing, I got blackened mahi mahi, grilled vegetables and garlic mashed potatoes.  I had two drinks, one of which was a Blue Moon Martini.  I felt like it was a sign!

I got accustomed to his townhouse, met his cats (he got them for his daughter, but he only has her part time).  We watched the Lifetime Lizzie Borden movie (ha!), we had brunch, we got very little sleep (4 hours for him, 2 for me, MAYBE).  I cannot sleep well in new places and it was so deafeningly quiet.  I joked that next time I'm bringing Zquil or a fan for white noise.  We played Wii bowling, Wii golf, Super Mario World 3D.  I spent hours spooning with him, or curled up next to him, or tangled up with him.  I soothed cold hands on his chest, got drawn in beneath the drape of his strong arms.  I cuddled up against him, he absently kissed the top of my head, rubbed my hands. 

And then this afternoon we sat on his couch and took turns deleting our Plenty of Fish profiles.  ;-)

Four

4th date tonight.  He got there early, his strange 7-3:30 hours working in our favor on my day off.  I had him with me by 4pm, and it was so nice.  We chatted, kissed, relaxed for awhile, finally heading to Old Town for dinner around 6pm.  We walked around, saw the waterfront, meandered Old Town a bit hand in hand, huddled together against the chilly wind, and then had dinner.  I spilled my diet coke, it was so fitting!  Back at my place we just hung out until 11:15pm.  There was a lot of kissing.  I write this to you all with lips sore from the awesomeness of incessant kissing.  Things remained PG-13, which was an impressive feat this evening.

I texted him a bit after he left.  I thanked him for another great evening, and told him I loved having him here with me tonight.

His response?  "Anytime, of course.  I always have so much fun with you.  I feel very lucky to have met you."

We laugh so much.  I continue to feel like the best, most sparkling version of myself when I'm with him.  Even when I have an awkward moment, or say something nerdy, I don't feel embarrassed.  I didn't panic when I spilled the Diet Coke.  I just knew it was okay.

While he was here I told him I felt like I had to soak up as much of him as I can and he agreed.  We were both reveling in the fact that for him, he normally "gets tired of people quickly" and I "feel smothered very easily".  We noted that the distance probably is helping that early on, and he said, "But when we do see each other it means more."  Sigh.

He just got home and texted me that he's already missing me, and can't wait to see me Saturday.

This is so foreign to me.  Normally this panics me.  Normally this freaks me out, makes me feel smothered and stuck and cornered.  But from him?  In this?  It gives me more and more happy butterflies and I can't wait to see his house, and his city, and know where he is when we're apart and talking, to have a visual.  I want to learn more and more about him, and to have him learn more and more about me.  This is all just so damn exciting, and I LOVE IT.

pieces

For my own sake as much as letting you all in a tiny bit on what I have here, this post is basically just snippets of conversations we've had just since our third date.  Nevermind that after our second date, when discussing plans for our third, he told me that, "The first thing I'm going to do is kiss you, because I already miss kissing you.  After that, I don't care, we can just get dinner somewhere, it doesn't matter."  And he did, and we did.  :-)

After our third date:
"I had a great time with you as usual.  It never matters what we are doing, I always enjoy it.  I can't wait to see you on Monday."  Got that before I even got home that night. 

"Those interesting things are what makes you so awesome." (Day after third date)

"Maybe you just bring out the interesting in me." (Day after third date)

In a conversation about me having bought new throw pillows, in the context of a running joke we had about my NY's Eve plans with my gf, A, and the ongoing dream of men that anytime two women are together we are in our underwear pillow fighting.  It segued into me talking about how I don't really have sleepovers so often, and he joked that I could find someone on CL to have one with.  I said yeah, since I can't find a real life volunteer, and he responded, "Yeah, it's not like you have someone you're dating who wants to hit you with a pillow."

Me: I'd rather kiss you than hit you with a pillow.
Him: Aww, please do.
Me: In two days I'll take care of that.
Him: I can't wait to see you again.  You just gave me a huge smile. 
Me: It's good to have something like you to look forward to.  :-)
Him: When I left work yesterday I was thinking to myself that I can't believe I'm looking forward to Monday.

Another time yesterday I told him he had good taste, and he said, "It seems that way recently."  I joked that flattery would get him everywhere, and he said that he seems to have it coming out of his ears around me.  I said, "Even better?  It feels sincere."  He said, "It is sincere, trust me.  You don't use condiments and you turn your meat into hockey pucks (because I got a well done burger on date #3).  I don't know where it's coming from, LOL."

Last night: "We don't have anything in common but making out.  Oh, and somehow being able to have a nonstop conversation."

When we were talking late-ish tonight and he was already in bed, I told him it's okay if he goes to sleep, as he has to work tomorrow.  He said  "I want to talk to you as long as possible :-)." 

****

It is so stupidly, amazingly, beautifully refreshing to have something like this right now.  I don't come home from my dates and have to decode anything he said.  I don't have to translate, or hypothesize, or wonder if he likes me, or what he meant by this or that, or why his words don't match his actions.  I don't have to debate about when it's okay to text him, or what it's okay to say, and I don't have to wait around wondering if I'm going to see him again.  We've talked about additional dates each time we've gone out basically, and after the third one I already had two more on the books.  We make comments about "adding it to the list" for things we want to do, or movies to watch together.  He mentioned making bread with his daughter this weekend, and I noted how I missed homemade bread, and he instantly offered to make more for me next weekend.

WTF, mate?  I am dating someone (God help me, I just said I'm dating him, not just going on dates with him, and YES, there's a difference in my head, LOL) who tells me that he likes me, tells me that he is excited to see me, makes timely plans to see me again, and with whom I feel like I am truly on the same page at this point.  It's a TWENTY FOURTEEN MIRACLE!

I know it's not bulletproof.  I know it's only been three dates.  I know all the warnings and cautions and be carefuls, and they are still in here.  But they are trailing at the bottom right now, being overwritten by excited butterflies, and a deep, warm want to kiss this person again, and to feel my hand entwined with his again.  He makes me laugh multiple times every day, he encourages me when I'm feeling tired, migraine-y, stressed, or when I'm on the elliptical and not feeling it.  He tells me I'm beautiful and it feels sincere and true, and I feel on my game and dynamic and sparkling when I'm with him, or talking to him, or thinking about him.

Three dates.  Date #4 tomorrow night and I can't wait to see him again.  There it goes...that little swirl of anticipation in my stomach, that involuntary smile, that flush in my cheeks.  I love this feeling.

let's start at the very beginning

I've been trying to write this post for at least a week now, but I always end up stuck.  I think a little part of me is afraid that if I write it down to share with people, it will go away, or get ruined, or collapse in on itself. It's not really a big deal yet in practicality, but at the same time, it's a very big deal.

Three dates.  In my last post I wrote about having had a first date that went well, with plans for a second. Well, the second one happened, and then a third.

I "met" him via POF a couple of months ago.  We chatted intermittently on the site, but he treated the messages more like IMs, always very short and conversational, so we never got a lot of content exchanged. He seemed nice, but didn't stand out in any way.  At some point in December, he asked for my number for the purpose of sending me a picture of a turkducken he was cooking, just because.  Thus began our text relationship, and suddenly he had personality, and a sense of humor, and he made me legitimately laugh.  I never even got the picture of that turkducken finished product btw.  ;-)

Anyway, when I was home for Christmas we were still texting, and he kept sending me the most hilarious little things, and I found myself more interested in talking to him.  We kept talking more and more, and by NY's Eve we were talking basically consistently through the day and evening.  We finally made plans to meet up on Friday, January 3rd due to a last minute scheduling change.  He has a 13-year old daughter who he usually has on the weekends, but she was unable to come that weekend, so he asked me out.  I told him my college football team had their bowl game that night, so we met at a sports bar to watch the game.

First impressions:  He was cute, looked like his pictures.  Six foot tall, blonde hair, fair skin like me.  The game was fun, and it lasted forever.  Conversation was pretty good, and I was attracted to him.  Not the kind of attraction I'd had with Artboy right off the bat, but the pleasant kind of attraction.  At the end of the night we hugged goodbye and went our separate ways.  Some hijinks ensued after we separated...his car got stuck in the snow.  I went back to help, but he got out right when I got back near him.  I headed home again, and one exit down from where I'd gotten the first time, he called again..his tire was flat.  Some luck!  I drove back to where he was, and he changed the tire by the glow of my headlights.  He thanked me profusely, apologized, bemoaned what a horrible first impression this was.  I joked and said that obviously it wasn't his fault, and that all it told me was that he liked fast, impractical cars (he drives a Mustang).  On my way home he texted me and again thanked me profusely and told me I was amazing.  He said he owed me and that he'd come out my way next time.  For the record, it was 1 am and 14 degrees out when all this happened.  Even if he'd been a D-bag I probably would have gone back to make sure he got everything squared away!

So that was date #1.  We soon made plans for the following Friday (his daughter is in a school musical and he wasn't getting her until Saturday that weekend due to rehearsals).  As promised, he came out my way. We met at my apartment and then went to dinner.  We saw "American Hustle" afterwards, and then I invited him in.  I wanted more time with him, and in spite of my hopes that a dark movie theater would embolden him, he didn't try to hold my hand or anything during the movie.

Inside we talked for about 20 minutes before I turned on the TV just for background noise.  CSI was on, and I absently mentioned this really silly episode as the only one I really remembered.  Lo and behold, it was that very episode on that night, so we watched it and laughed at the silliness of the storyline (It was called "Fur and Loathing" if that gives you any indication!).  It was nice to just sit next to him and laugh and loosen up a bit.  After the episode ended I was talking about something when he randomly kissed me.  Yay!

He's an excellent kisser, and we kissed for awhile, but it was very chaste.  I teased him about not holding my hand in the movie, and he told me that he hadn't wanted to be too forward and ruin it.  I thought that was very sweet, and it reminded me that just because a guy doesn't try to jump me on the first or second date, it doesn't mean he doesn't like me.  In fact, it can also mean the contrary.

He finally left to go home about 2:15 am.  It was raining, and another detail:  He lives in a town about an hour and 15 minutes away from me.  FIGURES!!  He works much closer, but he owns a townhouse about 20 minutes past where I lived with the Angry Ex.   After he left I was literally swirling with butterflies.  I think I did some serious dancing in my bedroom to music that was too loud in my headphones for my own good.

We continued to talk all the time.  From morning until before bedtime, never running out of things to say.  I marveled at this because honestly?  I feel smothered very easily, and I wasn't feeling it here.  He told me that weekend that he wanted to see me again, and since he had his daughter the coming weekend, asked if a weeknight would work.  We decided on this past thursday.

Thursday we met in the middle again.  We had dinner, and then walked around outside in the cold night air for a bit.  Everything around us was closed in the area we were in, so out of desperation for somewhere warm to go, we seriously went to Wegman's (a nice grocery store) and went upstairs to their dining area. We spent the next two hours on a wicker couch just talking and laughing about so many random things.  We were the only ones up there aside from a meandering cleaning person who was eyeing us to make sure we didn't get up to any funny business. We held hands, we flirted, he stole a couple of innocent kisses. Something that on the surface sounds so lame was actually kind of amazing and fun.

We finally left shortly before the store closed at midnight.  We kissed in the parking garage between our two cars for awhile, and it was such blissful agony...to finally be able to kiss him like I wanted to again, but to know that we were still in public, and that I had to go.  We finally, finally separated, but wow, was it difficult.

I left that parking garage feeling so many different things, but mostly just HAPPY.  Excited.  Full of good feelings about something dating related for the first time in so long.

We're going out again tomorrow night.  Did I mention that he texted me and asked me about doing something Monday WHILE I was on my way to see him Thursday night?  And that while we were on that wicker couch, we decided that next weekend I'm going out to where he lives to see him on Saturday night?

Yeah.  Three dates down.  Two more on the books.

I have way more to say about this.  I've decided that in the interest of this post not getting too stupidly long, I'm going to contain it to the factual events as they occurred, and I'll do another post for everything else.  So concludes the long overdue, long percolating, butterfly-inducing update.

** Still thinking of what I want to call him on here.  ;-)

Twenty Fourteen

So I wasn't too sad to wave goodbye to 2013.  I'm an even numbers kind of girl to begin with, and thirteen is just not a great number to me.  2014, or TWENTY FOURTEEN, just sounds so much better to me.  I feel more hopeful about this newly landed year than I have about years past.

I rang in my new year in a very low key fashion.  My gf, A and I went out to dinner at TGI Friday's of all places, as we were trying to avoid all the NY's crowds.  The food was weirdly tasty, and the host and servers were all in a jovial, entertaining, friendly mood for the New Year.  We indulged in fried green beans, burgers, and fries, and it was awesome.  :-)  After dinner we went back to my apartment.  We had Bailey's to drink and watched the various NYE coverage specials on TV, focusing primarily on the CNN Anderson Cooper & Kathy Griffin pairing because they are hilarious together.  We also shared laughs over our various online dating messages received that night, and mused about the potentials in the queue.

When midnight rolled around, we cheered the New Year's with laughter and a general sentiment that 2014 might be a good year.  No, there were no romantic midnight kisses to ring in the new year, but I have to tell you....that was the best NY's I've had in a few years.  I spent the evening having a stupidly good time with a really good girlfriend, and things just felt like they were where they should be for right now.

I don't believe in the concept of NY's resolutions.  I am just setting a goal to have a good, happy, healthy 2014, to remain positive even in the face of cynical life experiences, to keep my mind open, and my heart open.  I want to travel more, even if it's just around the continental US again like I have done the last couple of years.  Who's up for a visitor/a trip?  :-)

In other news, I did have a date on Friday night.  It went well, and we have decided to get together again this Friday.  No set plan for the evening yet, but at least its on the calendar.  If it goes well, I'll coin a nickname for him.  I've been reticent to offer up nicknames on the few people I've met in recent months because it seems pointless!

Aside from that, I had the usual holiday resurfacing of the ghosts of relationships past.  They ran the gamut from old ex-boyfriends from long term relationships (M, Angry Ex) to Baltimore Brad, to a dating site guy I never actually met.  So glad all of these morons think of me around the holidays.  Cheers!  ;-)

Time to wrap up for now, but I hope to be back more often with more regular posts in coming weeks now that the holidays are over with.  In the meantime, going to stay warm and cross fingers for some good dating luck and life luck in the new year!  Happy 2014!

Hey Girl

So, this Google Chrome extension is making me super happy: Hey Girl

It can be kind of inappropriate when reading awful stories on CNN, but it's awesome for Facebook and other lighter stories.  Also? It creates a dream world when I log onto PlentyofFish!  :-)

I'm almost done with my Christmas shopping.  I bought two small things last week, but other than that I did most of it yesterday.  I'd say about 70% was online, with some supplementary shopping last night at Kohls and Ulta.  Tonight will be Dick's Sporting Goods and Bed Bath & Beyond.  I should be just about done after that aside from one super quick gift pickup I'll have to do when I get to Omaha.  I'm pretty happy with most of what I came up with for everyone, and I'm excited to give all of my gifts!

I'm still waiting for my meeting this week (I presume) about my annual review and bonus.  I'm guessing now it will be Thursday or Friday since my supervisor didn't mention it yet when I talked to her today, and she's out tomorrow.  Boo!  I know my raise won't be anything stupendous, as the economy just doesn't allow for too much awesomeness in that area, but I am hopeful about my bonus.  We'll see!

I still have yet to watch any Christmas movies aside from Love Actually.  Watched it with a girlfriend the other weekend and it was the first time I'd seen it.  I really liked it.  :-)  Anyway, I definitely need to watch National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation, and I'd like to watch Home Alone and the Charlie Brown Christmas classic.  A Christmas Story is also on my list, but I know I'll see bits and pieces of that one over and over on Christmas day with the marathon!

Anyway, boring update, but it's better than nothing!

Delinquent

I feel like I haven't posted here in forever!  I guess it's been a combination of being crazy busy due to the holidays and end of year craziness, and also just not having a lot new to share.

I haven't even started my Christmas shopping yet.  However, I'm not too panicked, as my shopping list is short and I mostly know what I'm getting everyone.  I'm a bit stumped on what to give my ex-H, though.  For as much as he drives me nutty, he is insanely generous to me.  This year alone he gave me his "old" (READ: Less than 2 years old, perfect condition) 42" flat screen LED TV when he upgraded to a new one, got me a plane ticket to Orlando in January and paid for admission and fast passes to Universal Studios for us, he used his hotel reward points to get me an awesome oceanside resort room in Ft. Lauderdale for my birthday, and he scored us free, amazing tickets to the Chiefs v. Skins game this past sunday.  In addition, he pays for everything every time we go out to dinner, brunch, a movie, haunted house, anything.   The problem?  The man has everything he wants.  He makes good money and doesn't want for anything.  So I have no idea what I'm getting him.  I know I can't compete financially, and he doesn't expect it (or probably anything from me), but I am going to try to think of something thoughtful for him.

Tis the season for holiday events.  On Friday I went to my previous employer's holiday party, as I did last year.  It was a fantastic time as always.  I got to dress up, see old friends and co-workers, and indulge in a handful of amazing peppermint martinis!  Today we have a regular old all personnel lunch at work, and this is on the heels of a breakfast hosted by building management for all tenants.  Tomorrow is my current firm's holiday party, and then we have a holiday firm luncheon on Monday!  Craziness.

I'm really looking forward to tomorrow's festivities.  I got a gorgeous sparkly dress for the occasion, as well as some lovely sparkly shoes.  I have a new nail polish to match, and I've timed it so my usual hair appt. will be tomorrow morning, so I can reap the benefits of the blowout afterwards.  :-)  Luckily the party is at a hotel right next door to our building, so there will be no long treks in heels from the office!  I'm bringing sparkly flats to change into if necessary at the party, and definitely for after.

No news on the dating front.  Talking to some people, like always, but it's a hard time of year to make time to meet new people.  I'm trying to not think too much about the fact that a year ago, Artboy picked me up from the Metro after my holiday party. Sigh.  This year I'll definitely be going home alone, and that's okay. I have to work on Friday, anyway!

Saturday I have plans to go to Mount Vernon by Candlelight with a group of friends.  The weather folks are predicting another possibly messy weather day, though, and I'm hoping it doesn't screw anything up.  At the very least, it will probably be raining, which sucks since part of the event is usually outside.  :-/  I still plan to go so long as something crazy doesn't end up happening weatherwise, and it sounds like it should mostly be rain.  I do love the night-time tour of Mt. Vernon and the caroling and hot cider and everything.  Very old-timey Christmas!  I'd also like to get a Christmas ornament there as well.

Anyway, that's all I know for now.  Be assured that even when my posting is non-existent, I'm still reading along with everyone else!

long (for me) hair, I care

No normal person would look at my hair and say it's long, but it feels long to me.  I've been getting all kinds of compliments on it since I've been growing it out a bit (I'm working an A-line cut, though it's harder to tell unless it's straight).  In addition, I'm saving money because I'm not really getting stand-alone blowouts anymore because at it's longer length, it just doesn't look as cute that way anymore...by far.  It's a bummer because when it was shorter and blown out I felt incredibly chic and polished and beautiful.  Now with it longer the only way it looks cute is if I curl my curls, and that's cute, not chic/polished/beautiful.  My curls as they are are simply too flat, too disorganized, too messy.  I'm a little frustrated, but I don't know that there's much to do about it.  It looks better curly when it's longer, better straight when it's shorter.  First world problems.

In other assorted news:

A big, awful rat ran in front of me the other night when I was walking across the parking lot to my gym.  Gross. 

My Chiefs lost on Sunday to the Broncos, so my good luck streak courtesy of my Chiefs red nails has ended.  Maybe now I won't feel so constrained to keep them red ALL the time in order to keep the Chiefs on a winning path.  Got a nice pretty pink color on them last night. I've become a huge fan of the Revlon Colorstay line.  It's a base coat, color polish and top coat set that lasts much longer than regular nail polish on me, and has the look of a gel manicure, or so I've been told. 

Took Monday-Wednesday off next week, so as of 5pm Friday, I'm free for 9 days!  I'll be in Omaha Tuesday-Friday, but I have time at both ends to just hang out here.  So excited!

Currently obsessed with Andrew Belle's album, "Black Bear".  Discovered him last week when looking for something to do on Friday night, bought the album Friday morning.  Saw him in concert at a small local venue that evening with friends and he put on an amazing show.  Fantastic album, and I can't get enough of "Pieces", "Dark Matter" and several others! 

No big plans on tap for this week.  Just picking up some pants from the tailor (had to get a hem fixed), returning an erroneously purchased movie ticket (since they won't just credit over the phone), going to the gym, the trainer, etc.  Friday night I'm going to see "Catching Fire" with the movie meetup group I'm a part of, so that should be a good time.  Can't wait for that movie!

Nothing to discuss on the dating front.  Just going through the conveyor belt of options and not finding much noteworthy, and refusing to get any kind of amped up for any of the decent ones.  I've closed a lot of doors on a lot of unworthy people lately, and it's good overall, but still sad.  I've invested so much time and emotional energy into these people, at varying levels, and with varying returns.  But the bottom line is that they take more than they give, and it's not worth it anymore.  I've scissored them out of my world, and I hope they stay there, because it was hard to do in the first place.

Next week at this time I'll be in Omaha.  No work on the horizon for several days.  Just me, my family, my friends, everyone's new pets (brother got a bulldog, mom got a new adult cat).  I'll get to sleep in if I want.  Eat good food.  Get my workouts in to make up for the good food.  Get out of DC for a bit. 

I'm looking forward to all of it!

Hard Out Here

I love Lily Allen.  Seriously.

Hard Out Here

Is it crass? Perhaps.  But no more so than any of the other nonsense out there, and at least her's is for a point! 

Can't wait to buy the single.

things fall apart so that other things can fall together

I read the quote from the title of this post somewhere today, and I loved it.  Things fall apart so that other things can fall together.  I like the idea of that.  I think it's oftentimes true.  I hope it continues to be true because I have a couple of things falling apart right now, and I'd like to see the silver lining of it all.  They are not big things in the grand scheme, mind you, but still.

Trainer.  I love him personally, but am beginning to really dislike him professionally.  Too bad I just bought another batch of sessions!  I feel like he is very good at the actual personal training part of his job, but he is lousy at the business side of it.  He's not hugely reliable.  He's impulsive and irresponsible at times, and not hugely apologetic when it happens.  Saturday I had a session with him scheduled for noon.  I showed up a couple minutes early, waited for him to meet me at the door (it's a secured building).  I texted him about 12:05 to tell him I was there.  I left at 12:17 when I hadn't heard anything from him.

About 12:35 I get two consecutive texts from him.  "Are you not getting my messages?" and then, "Hello?"  I wrote back and told him that I'd not received anything other than those two messages right then. He replied and said he was running fifteen minutes late.  I don't know if that was an older message, or if he was saying that's what he'd told me before, or what.  It didn't matter.  It was 12:35, and I told him, "Bottom line, I waited until 12:17 for a 12pm appt., and when you didn't show or reply, I left.  I'm already home."  I didn't get a reply after that.

He is supposed to get weekly schedules out on Sunday.  I didn't get anything, so I emailed him this morning.  I got a schedule about an hour later.  For this week.

Pet peeve?  I cannot get a standard appt. to save my life.  It is apparently impossible, so my training day switches from one week to the next.  It drives me nuts because I don't get the schedule until Sunday or Monday, so I can't make any plans for the week until then.  Is it so unreasonable to ask for a Tuesday 7pm appt. every week?

I made an appt. with a small group training gym for women in the area for Thursday.  I'm going in for an introductory session and meeting.  Groups of four max with a trainer.  I am considering it.  Granted, pricing will be a factor, but it's something I'm looking into.  Like I said, I already have 20+ sessions remaining with my current trainer.  I would lose money if I sold them to another client, so either way, I will probably just keep them and use them up.  I don't know if I'll even like the new place, but it can't hurt to look.  Maybe the group setting would motivate me more, or be enough of a change to spark something in me.  We'll see.

All I know is my trainer is increasing his pricing packages come the new year (still super reasonable compared to others in the area), and I do not intend to pay more for this kind of service.  We're either going to have a come to Jesus throwdown talk in order for me to stay if I dislike this new place, or I'll use up my remaining sessions with him while transitioning to the new place.  Thursday will be interesting!  I see my trainer on Wednesday and have yet to decide how I'm going to approach him about things.

The other falling apart thing is just Artboy, but that's just a continuation.  I haven't reached out to him in two weeks, and he's reached out to me in a completely useless, idle ways maybe three times.  It can't even be called conversation mostly.  It still makes me sad.  I don't understand why it is happening like this, but ultimately, I can't change it.  I can't make him explain it, I can't force understanding my way.  I have to just let it go, stop seeking him out, move on.

In other news, I finally finished reading "Night Film" and I loved it.  I was disappointed when it was over because I just enjoyed the experience of reading it.  In spite of some very passionate conflicting reviews (READ: People seem to either adore it or loathe it), I really liked it and am glad I read it.  I picked up a new book "S." by JJ Abrams, which is a whole other kind of puzzle.  Not sure when I'll get into that one!

I also saw "About Time" yesterday with some girlfriends.  I'm not usually much for chick flicks, and I'm not really in a great rom-com frame of mind, but this movie was so much more than just a rom com.  It had dramatic elements, it had a great message without being cloying.  It's a movie that made me laugh and cry, and just smile a whole hell of a lot. I highly recommend it!

The dating thing is the same merry go round.  Getting to know people, wondering if they are losing interest, wondering if I am, wondering if we'll meet.  Who knows!